to think or not to think

After posing questions to the meditation session participants, inviting them to reflect on those questions, and then sharing in a silent group meditation practice, a participant asked,

“You give us lots to think about during the reflection time and then are we      supposed to stop the thinking during meditation?  I’m so confused about  when I should be thinking or not thinking.”

Great observation.

To think or not to think.  Is that the question?

There’s nothing wrong with thinking or not thinking.

The key is to have enough influence over your own mind so that your mind is not compulsively running the show 24/7 and dragging you along helpless for the frenetic ride.


Whatever you are doing, do it.

When you’re thinking, think.

When you’re meditating, notice the thoughts, notice the desire to think then train the mind to come back to the breath or the body while letting the thoughts go. 

porch solitude


I remember a time when I first started meditating, many moons ago, I was absolutely thrilled for some quiet time to sit and think during meditation. I had created no space in my daily life to think.

Clearly missing the point of meditation. But this view of meditation-as-permission-to-think viewpoint made training my mind to settle even more challenging .  I was filling the stillness and space with thinking.  Intentionally yet unaware...story of my life!  


But once I introduced intentional times of non-doing and constructive rest into my life and gave myself permission to indulge in as much relaxed-body and mind thinking time as I could handle.  This allowed the training my merry-go-round mind in my mediation practice easier. Not easy. Just easier.

To think or not to think is not the question.

Being aware of thinking and choosing when to do it and when not to do it is the practice.  It is your practice.  It is my practice.  Still.  Always.

It’s a question of who is ultimately in charge. You?  Or your mind?


coffee mates

Who do you have coffee with?

Who are those people you most regularly meet up with to have connecting catch-up conversations?

Those slow chats that are laced with lingering, easy silences and inside jokes.

When you meet up with these chat-buddies, what is the texture of these talks?

Is the talk flat and small?  Mostly about other people and their failings or unfounded fears for the future?  Or is the talk expansive, enlightening conversation about ideas, gratitude and still have room for some expression of vulnerability along with the excited plans for the next adventures in life.

Do the chats open you up to life or make you want to hide away? Do the people you regularly caffeinate with inspire you to be bigger or smaller?

I once heard a saying about how we become like the people we have coffee with.

What would change if you noticed the texture of your talk and chose your coffee mates wisely?

Thoughts to ponder over your next cuppa joe.


spring at the beach house